Monday, November 15, 2010
I've been doing a bunch of standup, so sorry about the lack of updates here. Here's some of that action:
Comedy as a Second Language has been going really well, thanks to everyone who has been coming out to support the shows.
The feature-length indie zombie-comedy movie in which I acted has just been released in Japan. Go get it, suckah, especially if your dvd player can play all regions. Was gonna link to the site, but I can't find it, soooo good luck with all that!
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Got a letter from my grandmother, completely keeping me abreast of familial concerns. She really is an amazing lady-- she and her twin sister are the matriarchs of matriarchs. Respect. At the end of her last letter, she was all like "we miss you, you should come back (to Baton Rouge) soon... remember, you're a SOUTHERN BOY." Funny how I miss my family and Southern Louisiana, but I still feel like the South can suck a fat one--hospitality? Sure. Keep the xenophobia & homophobia & agoraphobia (!?) and everything else. I recall having been raised on poptarts and Ninja Turtles. Blissfully/unknowingly having played in the aisles of Wal-Mart. Mama's Family & The Highlander. Saved By the Bell. Sure, I read Longfellow's Evangeline. I've taken an airboat tour of a swamp or two. Spent a tremendous lot of time in New Orleans & surrounding areas-- actually, I'm fairly-well versed in my great state's unique and fascinating history. But a Southern Boy? Perhaps a recovering suburban retard, at best--then during my college years adopting the position of world-citizen. It's a world view to which I still adhere, enjoying New York while I can-- it's the world capitol, after all, and ought to stay that way 'til 2027 or so when Bejing takes the title and United Staters resort to civil war & cannibalism (The Road!!! holy shit....), etc. Until then, sex, drugs & heavy bass and/or rock n' roll! Holler. More soon. With links n' all that. Maybe.
--sent from the cell--
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
So the CSL Three-Year Anniversary show was super-sick. FIVE-HOUR marathon show! Sean hosted the first half, I hosted the second... the back lounge was packed almost the entire time, plus there were nearly 100 comics just hanging out, helping us celebrate. Here's a list of the performers: Jim Gaffigan, Todd Barry, John Mulaney, Myq Kaplan, Ted Alexandro, Seth Herzog, Yannis Pappas, Matt McCarthy, Ophira Eisenberg, Sam Morril, Morgan Murphy, Rojo Perez, Phil Hanley, Sean O'Connor, MURDERFIST, plus a couple more... it was completely ridiculous! Thanks to everyone who came out and supported the show! Great times... even if TimeOut NY has it in for us, we're still going strong!
My Dad has recently gotten online, which is awesome. We Skyped and drank a beer together this past Sunday, which was sooo much fun. Here's a little belated Father's Day shoutout:
Sonny Calloway is by far and away one of the greatest people I've ever met--he will do anything for anybody, and is the original Altered Beast. Splittin' V's before xmas dinner? Check. Teaching me to smoke on the go by pretending to wash a vehicle at the carwash? Check. Hell, even BEFORE all that goodness, I recall having inquired about Mary Jane when I was 14 or 15, because the smell of this allegedly dangerous drug my friends were starting to enjoy brought me back to being a toddler wondering what exactly was so pungent in my Dad's Tupperware container. His reply: "Well, son, that's marijuana. Now I'm not saying YOU should smoke it, but people do. And just a little bit is all right-- so long as it doesn't affect the way you do your job or treat your family n' friends, then just a little bit here or there is ok. Like eatin' a Valium every once in a while or a havin' a few beers after work--ain't no big deal. However, there are life-ruinin' drugs. Don't ever do nuthin' with needles--lost some good friends to that stuff, you should steer clear. Now, you'll probably run into cocaine, too--that stuff is bad for you. Of course in the 80's everybody was doing it, lots of it around. But it's a bad idea, it'll mess up you sinuses, it's too easy to get hooked on and it's damned expensive... but a little bit of grass, it ain't too bad, but it's all about yer responsibilities."
Notably, he didn't say anything about prescription speed or psychedelics, two of my favorite Altered Beast inspirations. Hmmm... Either way, I've always appreciated his early call for moderation. Dad, I love you!
--sent from the cell--
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Present day, New York City:
--Three Alien eggs find their way into the NYC sewer system, the facehuggers implant embryos in three of the four Mutant Ninja Turtles (no longer teenagers!). Michelangelo is the only Turtle left.
--A female Predator (breasts & longer dreadlocks!)--upset with the patriarchal/hunting Predator society--goes to NYC to hunt for a trophy to prove her worth to her male counterparts. It looks like she's hunting Ninja Turtles.
--A Terminator (T-800) appears, hellbent on destroying the three turtle-Aliens (Turtalien?) because, in the Skynet-ruled future, the Aliens are mucking up their robot shit or whatever.
--Michelango, ever the party dude, gets the Predator super-stoned and, instead of fighting, they end up hooking up.
--The Predator wants to hunt the Terminator because it would make a sweet trophy, but the Terminator just wants to destroy the Aliens-- as does Michelango because they killed his buddies, but is having a hard time because the Aliens kind of look kind of like them. Right when the Predator is able to provoke the Terminator into fighting, the Aliens show up.
--A battle royale ensues featuring all of the above, plus cameo appearances by both Spiderman and Wolverine who work together to kill one of the Aliens and nearly kill the Predator, too, but Michelangelo manages to stop them. One of the Alien's acid blood gets all over Wolverine's adamantium claws, but instead of eating through 'em, it just makes his claws acidic on top of already being razor sharp.
--Right when the last Alien is about to get it (from a teary-eyed Michelangelo), a huge, fierce QUEEN Alien bursts in and they all have to work together to kill her in a battle that starts in some huge underground cavern but ends in... Times Square? Maybe the Grand Central Terminal.
--The Predator takes out the Terminator for her prized trophy, then starts makin' out with Michelangelo. Also, Spiderman and Wolverine start making out (surprise!). Weylend-Yutani comes in and quickly removes the queen Alien's carcass to take to its bioweaponry division. The Predator ship arrives--all the Predators are impressed (& have clearly visible Predator boners), but the lady Predator decides to stay on Earth with Michelangelo (on the condition they move out of the sewer get a real place).
--Before they leave, Michelangelo trades the Predators a few ounces of pot for some nunchucks that can turn invisible like the Predators' other gear, sparking an eventual civil war within the Predator society because the infiltration of marijuana into the Predator society creates a whole generation of Predators that don't give a shit about trying to prove themselves through hunting.
OK, get to it!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
The comedy has been going swell. In January I produced a show in the BR called "L is for Laughter," which went well enough despite inclement weather. Both my Dad and my brother appeared in some of the promo videos, which were completely ridiculous. Later in January (back in NYC), the three-year anniversary of Taint Comedy Great? (also my 30th bday celebration) was an insane blast--just a killer show. Also, a few weeks ago I got to bring Janeane Garofalo to the stage at CSL, which was amazing. Those weekly shows have been so badass. My co-producer, Sean Patton, was actually on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon and totally crushed. After Sean's set, Fallon walked on to the stage and plugged the weekly show "Thursdays at Kabin in the East Village on Second Avenue and Fifth Street" or something to that effect. Sweet. Also, we have a new(er) promo video, a second one. Check it out here.
Also, I got a Nintendo DS Lite for Xmas, and snow boots. For one of the two I bought a cartridge to play downloaded/emulated games. The modern equivalent of Tetris Attack? Check. The New Super Mario Bros? Check. Tetris DS? Check. Modern Warfare 2!?!? Check. Not as good as say, XBox360 or PS3, but hey, beggars can't be whiney gamers. Also, and don't judge me, but I loaded up the Little Mermaid game. The game is fucking stupid, but I found this bit of dialogue hilarious:
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Tuesday, November 3, 2009